Chris Brown

Not for nothing…but I would be a litttle scared to be this close. Okay ALOT! Don’t beat me!!!

Missing Miss Daisy

Jessica Simpston, maam, I have a few questions. Do you think she could have run away? Did you have a fight the last time you two were together? Did she seem depressed? Did anyone else have a fight with her?

Adrien Brody

Both look just like daddy.

Simon Cowell

I can imagine how this would go:

Simon (in British superior accent)  “Are you an idiot? Why didn’t you flush the toilet? Loser pets don’t flush toilets. It’s true. What did you think, I’m on America’s Got Talent just to father an incompetent, stupid bag of fur?”

Halle Berry

Which bitch is fiercest? I know my answer.

Paris Hilton + clan

Do you have a dog per every billionth dollar?  Also Paris, I’m starting to notice when you don’t have a guy next to you, you have an animal friend. Can’t you just be content paying the paparazzi to follow ONLY you, Solo Johanssen-style? Listen to me, you are enough. Get it together.

Mariah Carey

Who has a higher octave? I’m gonna go with mom on this one.

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